- Megan Stapelberg
3 steps to teach children how to set boundaries.
Boundary setting can be hard for us as adults, so how do we teach our children to feel confident in doing this at a young age? See below my 3 recommended steps!
1. Our boundaries are like a bubble:
Explain to your child that our boundaries are like a bubble that surrounds us. We like it if certain things or people come inside that bubble, but we prefer it if certain things or people stay outside of the bubble. Have a conversation with your child about the people/ things that they like to have inside and outside their bubble.
2. We can say no if something or someone is getting to close to our bubble:
Saying no does not mean that we are rude or insensitive. Teach your children to say no in a kind and respectful manner. This way you teach them that they are worthy of communicating to others when they feel their boundaries have been crossed. If we choose to say no in a kind and respectful manner and the other person does not take this well, it has no reflection on us. We can only take responsibility for the way we choose to communicate our boundaries towards others.
3. Sometimes we have to say no more than once:
It is important for your child to learn that a lot of people do not accept 'no' as an answer and will try to push our boundaries. Therefore saying 'no' or 'stop' or 'I don't like it' once will not always necessarily be enough. Persistence is key! Remind your child that it is okay if they have to repeat themselves.
Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves even when we risk disappointing others- Brené Brown